Waste not, want not!

I hate to throw food away so try to find ways to use things up this usually does not work very well and I should have learned by now, but never do.  We had a butternut squash that needed using so decided to make chutney, one we had made before that was really nice.  As usual I got stressed trying to follow recipe and stop Emily from jumping in and doing things that did not need doing and getting Rob to peel and chop, the saying too many cooks springs to mind.  Anyway we got it done and simmering in the pan and I asked Rob to turn it out before he went to bed. When I got up this morning Rob said he thought it might be a bit over cooked!  When he had turned it out and poured it into a dish the bottom of the pan was burnt and a lot of the contents stuck, it all tasted burnt, so now not only have I wasted the squash, but also expensive sweetener  vinegar, apricots, onions and so on, I am so fed up.  Not only have I wasted all that stuff the whole house stinks of vinegar, its horrid. I get upset when things like this happen as it uses a lot of my energy to do the things and then when it also does not work out its a big disappointment.

Feeling rubbish today, sick and dizzy, weak and pathetic.  I have got a dietician appt later, I really don't want to go, its a waste of time, but all the medical people I see assume that because I am thin I have an eating disorder!  I might be thin, but not that thin and I eat well.  I do have problems due to food intolerances, but that does not mean I don't eat just have to find alternatives.  The appt is right in the middle of when I usually rest before collecting Emily from school, so won't get a proper rest either. Makes it difficult to know what to do as I know I need to rest, but also have lots of things that need doing and sitting here worrying about the different options does not help either, I just want to go to sleep and forget about everything, some hope!

I got the card cut to size last night, need to start the pricking the pattern, but think I am too dizzy today.  Did finish another piece of Shaun sheep last night, he now has a body, tail and top of head.  Wonder if I will have it finished in time for his film debut.

Ah well the joys of ME and decision making, life goes on!

So upset

I am very upset this morning as I am not well enough to go to the quilting class.  Having had less than 4 hours sleep and already being exhausted anyway its just a step to far.  It makes me feel so useless and upset that I have to sacrifice something I want to do because of the need to be able to manage the daily routine which already pushes me to my limits.

Rob has taken Emily to school and I am heading back to bed.  At least I have a good book to read Torey Hayden's twilight children, its sad but very interesting and appeals to me because its the sort of work I would love to have been able to do (play therapy) before the stupid ME came along.  I have read many of her books she is a very interesting lady and her work truly amazing http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Torey_Hayden

Shaun the sheep now has a body, I am using a Patons Shaun kit he is only small.  I also have a Pooh Bear kit, but he is bigger, I have had it for years along with many pooh cross stitch kits, I love Pooh Bear.  I do have a latch hook rug on the wall in spare bedroom, I bought it to do myself but it was too difficult my hands were not strong enough so I had to get someone to finish it for me.

Off to curl up with my book and hopefully catch up on a bit of rest so that I can face the weekend.